Mortgages and Tinder

Tracy Head • Mar 10, 2023
What do the two have to do with each other? This week I learned a new term – Tinder Swindler...


This comes from a Netflix movie about a fellow in Europe who duped numerous women out of money by borrowing funds with promises to repay them. This is a con that has been around forever in different forms but the increased prominence of online dating has really extended the hunting grounds for people that are looking for their next mark. In the olden days (like when I was young) this scam looked more like a wealthy older man being taken advantage of by a much younger woman. This was the stereotype in any case. This profile has now changed and the swindlers come in many different forms and of all ages. Although what follows is going to feel like I’m hammering one gender over the other, believe me the con comes from both genders. My hunch is that when men have fallen prey to these scams pride prevents them from disclosing.


Over the last few weeks years I have worked with three different women who have been conned out of thousands of dollars by men they met through online dating portals. In all three cases these are strong, independent women who work hard and have always taken care of business. All three own their own homes and have great jobs and clean credit. The game starts easily enough. They each met someone who seemed like a great partner. He was charming, caring, and seemed to have his act together. One case started with a request to borrow cash as the partner was in a bit of a jam. Then, in all three cases, for one reason or another the new partner couldn’t seem to hold down a job. In one case the partner was starting a new business and just needed some cash to get things off the ground. In one case the new partner used her computer to apply for additional credit and intercepted the mail before she knew she had new cards coming. It goes without saying that in all three cases the women are left holding the bag with no hope of recovering any of the money they are owed.


For two of these women we were able to refinance their homes to consolidate all of their debts, but for

the third she found herself in the horribly difficult position of having to sell her home. After three years

of hard work she was able to buy a home again but this was definitely a huge hit to her retirement plans.

Before you are tempted to judge these women for allowing themselves to be victimized, understand

that none of the three are stupid women. They were trusting to a fault, and never thought for a minute

that their partner was anything other than the front that they saw. This is intended as a cautionary tale. If you are early on in a relationship and your new partner is looking to borrow money or asking for you to apply for credit on their behalf, open your eyes.


Trust your gut. Question why they are in the situation they are in. Get the details. Don’t be afraid of difficult conversations to get to the truth. Life happens to us all, and sometimes things are as they seem. However, if you are in a relatively new relationship and your partner is looking for money … think long and hard. It’s a slippery slope. One woman said to me “In for a penny, in for a pound. I kept hoping things would turn around and if I held out he would pay me back. In fact it just cost me more money.”

If you find yourself in this situation, I urge you to make a move and get help sooner rather than later. There are often options you are not aware of so you need to make changes as soon as possible so your credit and financial situation are not compromised.


On a different note, if you own a home you should have received mail from the provincial government asking you to complete a declaration regarding the Speculation Tax. Make sure you take care of it before the March 31 2023 deadline or you may receive a tax bill of up to two per cent of the value of your home.

Tracy Head

Mortgage Broker

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Read your mortgage paperwork.

By Tracy Head • 03 May, 2024
Sharing this situation as a reminder of the importance of reading the fine print. I have been working on a refinance at renewal for clients in northern BC. They had tried to sell their home but their acreage is unique so they did not have any offers. Their home sat on the market for over a year and their mortgage was coming up for renewal. In the meantime life happened. They were at limit on multiple credit cards and credit limits and were stretched pretty thin. Work slowed for a bit so his income was down and they had a new baby so she was on maternity leave. They did have a significant amount of equity in their home so the plan was made to consolidate their debt to improve cash flow for the short term. We got an approval with a great rate. So far, so good. The approval stipulated that most of their credit cards and lines of credit would be closed. I had submitted the application specifying which ones were to be left open and which were to be closed. When the mortgage commitment came from the lender I double-checked the list and all was in order. The lender pulled the clients’ credit reports about two weeks before closing and came back with a few changes because they were now over limit on two more cards. The clients went to the lawyers and learned that the new lender wanted an additional credit card closed. This particular card was one they used for rewards points so they were not willing to close that specific card. They discovered this change when they were signing with the lawyer two days prior to their scheduled closing date. I became aware of this the morning their mortgage should have finalized. Their lawyer had told them it wasn’t an issue and that she would sort it out, but the lender was unwilling to compromise on this. The clients called me and were very frustrated. After several calls back and forth with the lender and the client we were able to reconfigure their file a bit so that card stayed open and another credit line was closed. So where does reading your mortgage paperwork come in? Most people thing that once they sign their original documents from their mortgage person that their financing is set in stone. In point of fact, there is always fine print that includes something to say that any material change to the clients’ financial situation may cause their financing to be altered or cancelled. A wise broker I know shared a list of Ten Mortgage Commandments with me in my early days. It laid out ten things you should never do between the time your mortgage is approved and the time it finalizes. It included things like you should not change jobs, buy a new vehicle, co-sign for any loans, spend your down payment, go over limit on your credit cards, etc. At the time I remember thinking to myself that the list was so condescending that I would never share it with clients. After many years and interesting scenarios as a broker I go over this list with almost every client. If you think no one would do those things I can assure you I’ve seen it happen. In this situation we were able to sort things out and their mortgage funded the next day. If you run into something similar at the last minute, loop your mortgage person in. They will likely have no idea that things are happening behind the scenes and they are in the best position to help you navigate through it. Our goal is to help you have a smooth experience so we are here all the way through the process. Part of my practice is to connect with my clients’ legal representatives so that they have my contact information in case anything like this pops up last minute. Clients often don’t know that they can reach out for help, and the lawyers may not think to ask. Should something like this happen to you at closing time, take a deep breath and reach out to your mortgage person. It may be very simple to solve when the right people are helping.

Procrastination

By Tracy Head • 19 Apr, 2024
This morning I was up with the birds (literally) and really wanted to sleep a bit longer. I decided to listen to a podcast rather than get up. The podcast, ironically, was about procrastination.  Her general message was that procrastinating often makes us feel bad. There are things we want to accomplish or feel we should do but we choose the immediate gratification / dopamine hit of time in front of the TV or mindless scrolling (or more time in bed) rather than the satisfaction that comes with achieving our larger goals and dreams. She talked about procrastinating with both our actions and making decisions. The irony that I was listening to the podcast rather than getting up and tackling my day was not lost on me. There were a few comments the podcaster made that struck home. Making a decision, any decision, is better than no decision. Human nature (for many of us) is that when facing a tough decision we freeze. We over-analyze the “what-ifs” and potential outcomes. We worry about what others may think of our choices. We may not even know what our options are. While procrastinating opportunities are lost or we dig ourselves in a bit deeper. The last year in particular has been challenging with higher interest rates and a steadily increasing cost of living. Many families are struggling to cover their bills and put food on the table. I’ve written columns before about how if you have equity in your home it might be wise to consider a consolidation of your consumer debt to free up cash flow. Making lifestyle changes can be easier said than done. I believe that staying the course and getting your mortgage paid off as soon as possible is always the best plan, but there comes a time when you also need to look at how your finances are affecting your physical and mental health. When we get behind with our bills or are teetering on the edge of not being able to cover everything this month we are also concerned about what people might think. We are worried about a call from our creditors asking for a payment. We project a certain lifestyle and feel the pressure to maintain this even though we can’t actually afford it right now. We lose sleep at night thinking about the “what-ifs”. If you are in this situation and have equity in your home, I encourage you to take action to explore your options sooner rather than later. I have worked with clients who have never missed a payment ever but their credit scores were in the 500 range (not good) because they are over-extended and maxed out on multiple loans, credit cards and / or credit lines. Had they reached out sooner we would have had more options to help them with a fresh start. This doesn’t mean we can’t find options, but there are certainly more available when credit scores are higher. As a rule I don’t get into the discussion of why you would work with a mortgage broker versus a bank but this is one of those times. I do place many of my clients with chartered banks when that is the right fit. When you approach your bank your situation might not be a fit for their lending guidelines. They may tell you they are not able to help you and that you will have to sell your home or look at a consumer proposal or bankruptcy. Selling your home may be the right answer, but before you jump to that place take a look at other options. Pick up the phone. Don’t procrastinate. If you are working with a mortgage broker they are able to explore multiple lenders and programs to help you try to find a solution to put you on the right track sooner rather than later.
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